iron plate with bullet hole

Editor's Note--TFF Issue #2

On April 28, 2014, I had the ride of my life. It wasn't in a Mustang Shelby GT 500 or an Aston Martin Vanquish, two vehicles I've often had intense fantasies about. Though I was in a dream-like state, it had nothing to do with a previously established and vetted fantasy, and had everything to do...

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Little Sister-Big World

Little Sister, Big World

Last Saturday, Amy and I loaded up all three kids in the car, traveled five minutes before the how-much-longers started, very nearly became victims of spontaneous head popping off syndrome, and, six hours later, one way, made it to Kansas City, MO. ...

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Train crash

Ticket to Riots

Years ago, my sister Tabbi introduced us to the board-game Ticket to Ride. The premise of the game is to build as many routes between major US cities with your train pieces as you can, stringing together as long a train as you can, in an effort to garner the most points. More routes = more points....

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Casket Company

Remember the scene in one of those mafia movies where the distraught widow, grandmother, or mother, in a fit of sobbing, throws herself on the decedent’s casket, either wanting to be buried with them or begging for a second opinion on whether Junior’s really dead? Now, in my opinion, there are a...

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Pine nuts in ceramic bowls

Greek Gaa!

Avoid gluten, do more cardio, walk with family members, go to the gym with friends, do a master cleanse, don't eat fast food, eat all the fast food you want, eat only fruit, eat no fruit, avoid dairy, go buy yourself a freakin' cow. ...

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America the Inscrutable

Remember the Tim Taylor grunt? That onomatopoeic sound that resembled a bull getting ready to charge, a cow getting tipped over, and a man, fresh off holiday gorging, getting a big--albeit pride-inducing--surprise upon his trip to the john the next day. ...

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5 Awesome Things

1. Flycatcher insect-catcher strips. There is no quick fix to the problem of insect infestation, and by infestation, I mean greater than or equal to one six-legged creature within the boundaries of my real-estate domain. But by hanging a couple of these in my basement, at least I can revel in my...

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The boy gets his hands on a new acquisition, and he smiles, for nothing physical touches his extremities. This latest addition to the arsenal of power over his rival could be the final surge that pushes his enemy past the breaking point, and since this tool, this sacred relic of dominance, exists...

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5 Reasons to Eat Fast Food for Dinner

1. You can find out how much your son trusts you when he tells you at least 10 times not to eat the last taco, because he plans to hog it for himself for lunch the next day, and then goes a step further and draws a sign on construction paper with his name on one side, his sister's name on the other,...

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Ethereal Excitement

The movie, "The Invention of Lying," presents a world where people are incapable of lying. They just say whatever is on their minds, such as:...

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